The Original tongue-in-cheek captions with the photos in this section resulted in angry letters from people who drive old Jeeps and the like that've been heavily modified so they're only good for off road driving. That didn't bother me, but then they started sending threatening letters. That still didn't bother me, having been threatened by professionals, I tend to ignore amateur threats. But I did think about the captions. First I thought of changing them. Then I decided to add this disclaimer for the above people. I'll try to keep it to words of 6th grade vocabulary:
DISCLAIMER 1: The following is written with a light-hearted tongue-in-cheek, dry sense of humor. If you don't like any of it, you may stop reading at any point and move to the web site of your choice. If you want to send me photographs of your Jeep on Baja or the craters of the moon, please stifle the urge. They clutter up the in-box and take too much time on my lousy 33.6 connection. If you want to tell me how much you hate the Mercedes SUVs, The Redhead, or Me, in regards to this photo essay, please address the comments to: dropdead@eatshitanddie.com.
SCENE: Big Bend National Park, the Panther Gap Ranger Station.
The Redhead to the Park Ranger: We would like to drive some of the primitive trails. What can you recommend?
Park Ranger: Well, the Old Ore Road is nice.
It has some spectacular scenery,
and it isn't too bad if you have four wheel drive.
You do have four wheel drive, don't you?
The Redhead: Yes. How long will that take?
Park Ranger: 4, 5 hours.
The Redhead: That'll leave us time for an afternoon run.
Park Ranger: Well, you can't do the whole River Road.
It takes all day. How about the River Road to the old abandoned quicksilver mine?
The Redhead: Then how do we get back?
Park Ranger: Just turn around and retrace. When you get to Glen Springs Road, you can take it if you like?
The Redhead: What about this shortcut from the mine to Glen Springs?
Park Ranger: That's Black Gap Road. You don't want to take it.
The Redhead: Why not?
